The video dead (1987 Director: Robert Scott)

Ahh.. I hadn’t seen this one for over 20 years but I went to stay at my mate Colin’s this weekend and as he’s another video fiend, he dug out this beauty to watch (along with ‘Spookies’.).

The funny thing is that the title is totally misleading-it should really be called ‘The Television dead’ as there isn’t even a VHS player in it. Anyway the said TV set turns up as a special delivery to a house frequented by someone looking a little worse for wear. It seems that the TV has a life of it’s own so to speak as it unleashes a bunch of zombies into the house and our unsuspecting host is found dead a couple of days later. He was probably too drunk to notice anyway.

Fast forward a couple of months and a family is moving into the same abode. The Girl and her dorky brother are there first there while they’re waiting for the parents to arrive. The brother discovers the TV, hooks it up and it’s not long before the deadites show up with an appetite for death. That'll please the parents when they eventually show up I'm sure.

Great fun all around-there’s even a zombie that bears an uncanny resemblance to David bowie (surely that can’t have been coincidental!!!). There’s more gore than I remember too as this came out in the late 80’s when pretty much every horror film released in the UK got the scissors treatment courtesy of the BBFC. (Bless ‘em).

The highlight of watching it this time around was hearing my mate Colin go ‘ Wooah-what a fox!!!’ in relation to the female zombie with the wedding dress and ginger wig on. It’s films like this that make us keep our VHS players still plugged in.

Titan Find (1985, director: William Malone)

Ahh.. I have fond memories of first seeing this via video tape from the local video library. It had a strikingly cool sleeve with a monster on it (always onto a winner in my book). Sure it’s an ‘Alien’ rip off but there were a few back then and this was easily one of the better ones.

A crew of scientists (American, of course) land on a planet in search of artefacts of an unknown origin. It seems the rival German crew landed first which is just as well as they’re all dead-except the late, great Klaus Kinski of course who is on fine pervy form here. Anyway it’s not too long until they discover the beastie responsible and the body count starts tolling up.

This is great fun-and still holds up as being incredibly entertaining. Plus there’s some gore and nudity (always a plus in my book). Check out the head exploding scene.

 This was released in the states under the super lame name ‘Creature’ but us Brits got the better title if you ask me. It’s the one you’re more likely to remember.

Also this has been released in the UK and US on DVD (under those titles individually) but albeit through bootleg  and  with a transfer culled straight from VHS anyway so I have no qualms featuring it on here. Plus how could I not with that awesome sleeve.

Night Caller (Philip Chan, 1985)

Back in the mid to late Nineties I was pretty much obsessed with Hong Kong cinema (especially the Category III and Heroic bloodshed genres). There was a time where I was constantly buying and trading tapes-stuff was coming in all the time. Some of those films only got watched once and then forgotten about and confined to boxes and stored in the loft), such is the case of ‘Night caller’ which is a shame as it’s an entertaining enough little movie which I really enjoyed revisiting after something like 17 years or so.

Set around one X-mas, things start off in fine style with an Argento-esque murder where a pretty woman is stabbed and shoved through glass. There is a witness in the form of the woman’s little daughter who survives but is so traumatised by the ordeal that she can’t speak. It turns out the dead woman used to work for a modelling agency and it seems that the owner knows the identity of the killer as he tries blackmailing them  on the phone but ends up being victim number two (in a pretty neat scene in a TV studio). Meanwhile detective Steve Chan (Philip Chan) has brought the little girl (who’s still playing mute) home to his wife as a Christmas present as such (the pet shop must have been out of puppies) while he and his colleagues try to track down the killer who does come to light not before and is - how shall we say -just a bit of a nutbag.
The ‘happy’ ending is as dumb as it is sickly but overall ‘Night caller’ is a decent way to kill 90 minutes. Apparently Philip Chan really was a police detective before he turned director. He certainly has designs of himself as something of a super cop in this movie. HK veteran actor Melvin Wong has a role too. The star of the show is Pauline Chan as Bobbi but I’ve probably given too much away with the statement. Oh well, sue me.
 My tape is an old HK import. I know it never got released here in the UK but I’m not sure if it ever got an official release in the states. Probably not although it may have wound up in the Chinatown video stores. I believe it was out in Holland though. Also it was released on video disc but never on DVD so it still qualifies to be featured in the VHS vault of death.

Nightforce (1987 Director; Lawrence David Foldes)

The first thing I wondered after watching this was ‘why is it called ‘Nightforce’ when it’s pretty much all set in the day?’. Never let relevance get in the way of a catchy title-or a plot for that matter. When rich kid Christy is kidnapped by terrorist Estaban and his cronies, her Fiancé’s brother Steve (who she’s been knocking off) decides to round up a few of his geeky college mates and form a rescue squad (as you do). The most interesting thing about this bunch is that lone female member Carla (Linda Blair) is among them. Luckily on their travels these halfwits hook up with the elusive Bishop (genre stalwart Richard Lynch), a lone mercenary who joins and ends up leading their cause. That’s fortunate for them as these idiots couldn’t run a bath (check out the end bit where one of them suddenly realises that he can't fly an helicopter). Anyway the top and bottom of it is that the chick gets rescued, the baddies get killed and nearly everyone gets to go home. The end.

Hardly a classic in the vein of anything you’ll see with Chuck Norris etc but this is mildly entertaining fare with bad rock music and gratuitous explosions that were typical of nearly every mid to late eighties action flick. Having a couple of cult film stars helps matters such as Richard Lynch (who’s always worth watching and has a rare role here as a good guy) and Linda Blair who to be honest is probably wasted as she doesn’t do a great deal really. Also Cameron Mitchell has a small part but sadly looks worse for wear. The years weren't kind to him before he croaked it in 1994. 

Overall Nightforce is worth a nosey if you like daft 80’s action films and you don’t try and compare it to any of the greats like ‘Die hard’ (which shouldn’t be a problem really-they’re hardly in the same league). It’s certainly the product of a bygone era which holds a lot of fond memories for this film fan.